Bump in the road

Ever found yourself down in the dumps? Ever felt the sense of dread as if you’ve unraveled into a dead end? Guess what? you’re not alone. We keep encountering these “bumps” in the road that only seem to expand as life progresses. The down time after each bump seems to keep escalating until you feel that you no longer want to get up. So the problem isn’t falling any more, its not getting back up. It has more to do with our mentality than with our actual physical ability, or lack thereof. Here are a few points that may help.

Your perception of “what” is greater than the “what”

A few years ago, upon being hired by a leading bank as a fresh grad, a friend of mine was immediately handed a special project that required special skill and knowledge of a new system that he had never heard of or seen. This project was of the utmost importance, he was told by an executive, and should the project fail he would be solely responsible and incur the wrath of the higher ups. He accepted the responsibility and walked out of the office determined to give it his all. As the news spread, the sentiments of his peers seemed to echo in unison, “are you insane? why did you accept something you can’t deliver? you just committed career suicide”. The “what” they saw was the fact that someone with no banking experience or knowledge of the system was required to deliver a project for the same in record time. Impossible! he begged to differ however. The “what” was true but his perception of the “what” was worlds apart. He saw this as an opportunity to learn in record time, to take it on with grit, to endure more earlier in his career. 18,000 screenshots and numerous late nights later the project was successfully completed and launched. The facts are absolute but what you make of those facts is entirely up to you.

Opportunity is allergic to negativity

Another friend of mine told me something that I never forgot, “opportunity is bombarding us from every corner, hell, opportunity can even be found out on the streets if you have the eye for it”. You can only have “the eye for it” if you are positive enough to seek it out. A person in a negative mindset wouldn’t recognize opportunity if it was served on a plate with a sign in BOLD letters. This kind of person would be too busy complaining about their circumstances or even blaming others for the perceived rut they’re in. They would be scratching and banging on the same closed door when thousands of others are wide open for business for them. A positive outlook requires belief in yourself and in the road ahead. Only when you have turned away from the closed door can you see the light shining from the open ones. Only when you let go of the whining, procrastination, self doubt and the word “can’t” will you recognize all the opportunities available to you at this very moment. After all “a bad attitude is like a flat tire. If you don’t change it you’ll never get anywhere.”

Failure as an opportunity to learn

There truly is no better teacher than failure, but a teacher can’t teach a student who keeps skipping class i.e. avoiding failure. Failures are abundant in an average person’s life. In fact, failures are rampant in an above average person’s life. Edison failed a thousand times before he invented the light bulb. Most of us would give up in the third try. Most people eventually give up and never open that chapter again thinking its all over. But its there in the back of their minds gnawing away, reminding them that they fell and never got up. Eventually it seeps into their personality making them timid and risk averse. Its not because they can’t do it but simply because they choose not to learn why they fell and to try again one more time. Perhaps its because failure knocked them out so hard that they developed insomnia about why they even started. We lose sight of the “why” and avoid tripping over again. Failure is what builds character if you are willing to learn from it. It teaches you what not to do. Failure is essential for excellence. Learning from failure is what separates the average from the above average. So if you’ve failed, consider yourself lucky, you’re on the right track, you’re doing something new. Now all you have to do is to learn why and keep going.

Its impossible to compare yourself to another

You’ll hear this a lot, “don’t compare yourself to others”. I personally believe that its impossible to compare yourself to others. No matter how similar someone may be to you, they can’t possibly have experienced the exact same things at the exact same time as you did. Experience is what shapes us over time. Even twins, no matter how identical, will have vastly different personalities altogether. Even their path in life will be incomparable. Don’t judge yourself according to the timeline of others. You are unique in personality and have your own personal experiences which no one else on this earth possesses. Most are often engaged in comparison to others and fail to recognize their own unique capabilities. Most are so engrossed in analyzing others that they fail to accept and explore their own path in life. It would serve you well not to demean yourself in this way and to give credit to your own struggles and hard work that resulted in a completely unique and incomparable person that stares you back in the mirror every day.

“Don’t compare yourself to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.”- Regina Brett

Life’s an adventure for better or worse. I’ve come across people who had everything they ever wished for and still complained and also people that barely had a pocket watch to their name and still dawned a genuine smile of contentment. Life is an adventure and its all about the journey and not the destination. The struggles are what form the best memories and not the trophy. The most interesting people in the world will have all kinds of stories to share of their struggle and how they overcame. Above all, this adventure is yours to own, to report, to share and to cherish later on. Make the best of it now and enjoy every last bit of it.

“Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one.” – Bruce Lee